afraidofeverything

Fear

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Survival by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Survival

I wear my scars like a soldier, Carry pressures of life on my shoulders, But these troubles are heavy like boulders, They say that when I get older, It wont be so hard to survive the world war 3thousands I've been put through. I look at you, And I wish that I could be that strong, Wish I didn't make so many wrong choices. Wish the voices of people trying to help me would reach my ears instead of being pushed by the fear of letting anyone physically or emotionally touch me. I started smoking in the 4th grade so that I would look tough, because I'd had enough of being pushed around. I thought that if the school bullying stopped, my mo

Atmosphere by afraidofeverything, literature

Kryptonite knives by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Kryptonite knives

blood is thicker than understanding fingerprints are like footsteps that mark us individual legs lifting leading towards identity bones, broken, growing showing us that, with cracks, life keeps on going, knowing that weakness is like a kryptonite knife made to tear apart life like multitudes of unidentified pills cryptic message on my phone that night lungs intake this so called fake, fate, oxygen air breathing smoke, leading to connected intersections of mind slowly making compensation for the evil thoughts you hate yourself for thinking condensation building on cracked glass windows while we watch street light sirens become

Weapons for my Destruction by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Weapons for my Destruction

This world ristricts me contradicts me lures me out and tricks me, my brother said that god just wants to convict me, cause i'm not what people are supposed to be like, he kicked me when i was down, crushed my pride and broke my crown, every time i turn around he picks at it wont give up the grudge so i tell him that im just an addict to this, insanity to this rebellion against humanity see, i dont care what you look like talk like love like think like hell, i hate you all equally at least i have some kindof degree of mercy the agression you see is temporary my words are weapons of mass destruction shaped to my

Already Gone by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Already Gone

silence. you're never really alone... you never have been. distorted whispers, hallucinations, your mind is sick. they tell you, one after another disorder. slip into your mind, retreat, escape. they say you're off in space and you dont want to go. speak, silent words, acknowledgement flickers in your eyes feeling the displaced chill, fear. panic. a tiny blue pill to place under your tongue make it all go away, but it never does. conversation. attempts to pull you open, invade your thoughts, to find out why. to help, they say. you cant save me, i'm already gone. withdrawn, defeated. the sounds and screams that you h

Losing it all by afraidofeverything, literature

Desensitized by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Desensitized

nobody knows, nobody cares. we're so damn desensitized from this life, the next and the beginning we lie and we lie and we dig deep inside only to cover it up with the intoxications we hold so dearly you can see so clearly, the way that we live if you can call this living, i say we're dead we're destroying ourselves, and everybody sees it and yet we continue, see through the red the haze, the ways that we go drink yourself blind, get yourself high slash yourself to ribbons, sinking into oblivion we're losing grip, we're falling fast we do everything we can to make the feeling last, but i dont wanna go everybody knows, nobody

Piano by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Piano

Silently waiting, for something unknown, breath visible in the cold air ahead of me the quiet breaking open to the sound so real i'm starting to feel lost, but it's nothing new, is it? you've hear this before, but you never say a word, unspoken, your lies flicker inside your eyes loss of understanding the pieces of you that die Given up on exclamations of feeling, anything, everything. slipping slowly into a shadow, like the way my hair falls just over my eyes you cant see me, but, oh, i see you, watching the way you move, the words you speak, so easily, untainted by insanity if you could only see the hopelessness in

Gun Shots by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Gun Shots

tonight i walked outside under the watch of streetlights cool calm breeze against my skin my shoes brushing the cracked cement rythm like the beat of my heart my pulse a signal that i am still alive, the blood still moving through my veins the air and smoke in my lungs exhale the world so still silence alone with my thoughts wandering off with the wind past the sky to spin around space something to remember myself by like the graffitti on garage doors i walk by in the alleyways our exclamations, like writing on cave walls a marking, like the way we write something down in case we forget our thoughts ourselves i foc

Asphyxiation by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Asphyxiation

inhale i stop breathing the air you take from my lungs asphyxiate im drowning heart strains beating against my rib cage escape the blood you taste our lips intoxicate together obliviate crashing walls, how i love your words when your defense falls violate morals barriers of disbelief syndicate lets die together lets live forever relate life and lust recreate trust become my drug sedate so i can drown in you reshape relax inhale you're my fucking oxygen suffocate without you asphxiate

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Survival by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Survival

Atmosphere by afraidofeverything, literature

Kryptonite knives by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Kryptonite knives

Weapons for my Destruction by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Weapons for my Destruction

Already Gone by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Already Gone

Losing it all by afraidofeverything, literature

Desensitized by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Desensitized

Piano by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Piano

Gun Shots by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Gun Shots

Asphyxiation by afraidofeverything, literature

Literature

Asphyxiation

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Already Gone by afraidofeverything, literature

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Already Gone

afraidofeverything

About afraidofeverything

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Canada
Deviant for 19 years
He / Him

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My Bio

Current Residence: The personal Hell of 6 mental disorders
Favourite genre of music: Classical/Trad punk/Weird stuff(like Muse, MSI, Pink Floyd)
Favourite photographer: =Kittynn
Favourite style of art: Photography, Abstract, Painting&Sketching, Poetry, Prose, Music
Favourite cartoon character: Atlas..... and Zim & JTHM
Personal Quote: I hate me more than you could ever hate me, and that means I win, right?

Favourite Visual Artist

Tom Vanderlee

Favourite Movies

American History X, Being John Malcovich, Corpse Bride, Proteus, The Butterfly Effect

Favourite Bands / Musical Artists

Muse, The Distillers, MCR, MM, MSI, Classical stuff....everything....

Favourite Writers

Shakespeare

Tools of the Trade

Patience

Other Interests

Good movies. Body Mod. Music. Pianos and Violins. Slams and Open mics. Photography. Sex.

Posts

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afraidofeverything

Dec 27, 2005

as they hammer those nails into your beautiful han

0 min read

Blindside - Pitiful No, i dont believe in jesus. though the bible is a lovely story. so. I've been keeping busy. thoroughly medicated. immersing myself in my art, my music, my books. still trying to get away from myself. still doing stupid things and feeling stupid even though i knew it was stupid in the first place. happens alot. i'll submit my newer piece and some photos of my paintings in a couple days. still breaking promises i make to myself. still fealing the acid coated sickness that follows every step i take towards the one person that fucks me up the most. still needing to learn how to walk away. got a keyboard and synth

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afraidofeverything

Nov 9, 2005

Headfirst for halos

0 min read

Glasses tomorrow. Found my digicam. finally. I'm thinking of submitting some special pictures to a special website. im not actually saying anything, because 1. i dont know if i actually will, 2.i just know im gonna get laughed at, 3.there are people who dont need to see said pictures. Sabrina is talking to me again. I've just about finished the painting i'm doing for her birthday. it's cool... I was a space cowboy for halloween. Superman woke up. going up to the island this weekend for Archie's birthday. Going up in december to visit Chelsea. It's fun jammin with mel. I missed being in a band. yay drums.

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afraidofeverything

Oct 6, 2005

train tracks and bullets

0 min read

I bought an authentic army helmet. 3 layered. bullet proof. first layer camoflauge fabric cover. second layer thick steel. third layer im not entirely sure... pretty strong and solid though. has grip bumps tokeep the helmets together. chin strap, and under-chin strap. $39.99 at 3vets. it's big. it's heavey. i want to wear it every day. after buying, i decided i may as well be a dead and mutilated US soldier. I plan to write WEAPON OF MASS DESTRUCTION across my chest. fake blood and psty skin. plastic guns and hand grenades. dog tags. i have cherry chapstick. --- ... sometimes i wonder about the things i manage to get myself into.

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Profile Comments 10

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You are amazing

thank you

Hello! Nice art!!

this is PlasticStars... aka staticbutterfly... aka [[ static . butterfly ]] aka MY MULE! LMAO!

Oh man... that was great... >> Errr... LOL. I'm thirsty. What are you having for lunch?

Hello! ^^

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEEN. ? ? ?

i-am-fear

Sep 23, 2005

everywhere and nowhere. still in vancouver, away from my evil sadistic parents, had a gf for 8 months, still writing, still slamming, still 17. still crazy. apparently i have 6 disorders. i've moved about 6 times. maybe more. moving in may lmao. sticking with the roommates i have now though. in one week i will have my computer, which means aim and palace and talking you you. im glad you didnt forget me lol. miss ya like hell, lexy.